Sometimes everything seems to be pointing to one inescapable conclusion. One glorious culmination of dreams just over the horizon. You can see the light in the distance just beyond focus. And suddenly you are filled with a confidence you didn’t know you had. You’re going to change the world by Tuesday, and everyone will be amazed at what you have accomplished.
Then reality hits. And you realize that bright light in the distance is an oncoming train barreling down upon you at full speed. And you fall into anguish and disillusionment and disappointment. Sometimes it is so overwhelming you can barely breathe. And you wait for the turbulence around to subside while you try to get your bearings.
And then you sit and oscillate between anger and apathy at yet another soul-sucking defeat. What’s the point of dreaming big when you fall big?
Honestly, I believe that our God given dreams (and failures) produce as much in the process of their realization as the end result we seek. The process is part of the plan. Every set back can be a step forward if we learn from it.
The hard part is regaining confidence to try again. Status quo is easy. Doing nothing is easy. Sitting on your ass is easy until your back hurts from couch slouch. When this happens, it’s time to move again.
I’m at that point in my life again. I can’t sit still any longer. I can’t passively let my life unfold in whatever way the winds blow it. For the first time in decades I feel a real sense of urgency that I need to accomplish great things for God. I believe that the light on the horizon is, in fact, what I have been looking for all this time. I want to run towards it at full speed even if it means running headlong into another brick wall. I have experienced enough failure that I bounce when I fall and my momentum carries me further than before.
Something great is coming! Maybe it is just the expectation that comes with a new year around the corner. Maybe it is the new found discipline that I have discovered in 2015. Or maybe, I am finally aligning my will with His Will and feel the urging of the Holy Spirit to run the race I have been called to run.
Whatever it is, I believe that the Lord is going to do great things in my life next year. I believe that he is going to do great thing in the lives of my friends. This isn’t a selfish ambition, but a Godly direction that I am pulled towards. The future is uncertain and I don’t know what the upcoming glories from God will look like, but I have the confidence to face them as they come. I am praying that I have the tenacity to work at His Will as well.
The dream is big, but my God is bigger. The greatness isn’t just in the future, it’s in the now! The work and the want have met in the wow. 2016 will be victorious.
I am a Christian, a wife, a mom, and a part-time basket case who wants to be a full time writer.